This Is Too Much! Part 23: When Context Changes Everything!

THIS IS TOO MUCH!

Part 23: When Context Changes Everything!

A Mathivation Research Lab Initiative 

Sometimes We Don't Hear What Is Said - We Hear What We Expect!

During my university study days, one of my friends, Pawan, used to say:

“Koi kahe kahun ki, Madan kahe mahu ki…”

He was from the Jhansi side of North India, and his way of speaking sometimes made ordinary words sound quite different.

At that age, we laughed about it.

But much later, I realised that there was a deeper lesson hidden in those innocent moments.

Sometimes people don't listen to you properly.

They hear a few words, connect them with their own context, add their own interpretation - and suddenly, the speaker's original meaning has disappeared!

In mathematics, we know that changing a variable can change the result.

In communication, changing the context can do exactly the same thing.

And sometimes the result is absolutely hilarious! 😊 


CASE 1: “WE'LL SEE AT NIGHT!”

I was in Grade 6.

One day, my father was helping me with my school drawing at home.

One of my uncles, Shree Dharampal, had come over to talk.

He was in one of those moods where one topic led to another, and another, and another…

Eventually, the conversation reached my drawing teacher.

My father casually remarked:

“Why don't these teachers make the students do the drawing in school itself? Why do they give it as homework?”

My uncle immediately added:

“This teacher doesn't do anything in the class.”

My father stopped helping me with the drawing.

He looked at me and simply said:

“We'll see at night.”

That's all he said.

But my uncle connected those words with the conversation about the teacher.

And according to his interpretation, my father meant something like:

“Usse kabhi raat mein hi dekhunga!” 😂

My father meant:

“We'll see the drawing at night.”

My uncle understood:

“We'll deal with that teacher at night.”

And I was sitting there quietly, watching the conversation change direction!

I don't remember what happened next.

But I certainly remember the lesson:

The same words can create completely different meanings when the context changes.

CASE 2: “BAAL DHO RAHI HOON!”

This one goes even further back.

I was probably around 8–10 years old.

My aunt was washing her hair in the bathroom.

My grandmother called from a distance:

“Bahu kahaan hai?”

My aunt replied:

“Baal dho rahi hoon.”

My grandmother heard something different.

She said:

“Oh! Daal dho rahi hai?”

My aunt immediately replied:

“Nahin!”

Then, using the rural expression for head, she clarified:

“Moond dho rahi hoon!”

My grandmother processed that information for a moment…

And then came the final interpretation:

“Achchha… moong ki daal dho rahi hai!”

😂😂😂

Baal → Daal → Moond → Moong ki daal!

In a matter of seconds, my aunt's bathroom had been transformed into a kitchen!

And I?

I was laughing loudly.

Probably much louder than the conversation deserved! 😂

WHAT WAS REALLY HAPPENING?

Looking back, these incidents were not simply about pronunciation.

They were about something much bigger:

Contextual Interpretation

We rarely listen to words in isolation.

Our brain immediately connects them with:

  • what we already know,
  • what we expect,
  • what we think the speaker means,
  • our surroundings,
  • our language,
  • our previous experiences,
  • and sometimes even our own imagination.

In psychology and cognitive science, this is often discussed through ideas such as top-down processing: prior knowledge and expectations can influence how ambiguous or incomplete information is interpreted.

This is useful.

It allows us to understand information quickly.

But it can also create mistakes when our expectations become stronger than the evidence available to us.

That's why:

What I Say ≠ What You Hear

And:

What You Hear ≠ What You Understand

And sometimes it becomes:

What I Said → What You Heard → What You Assumed → What You Concluded

By the time the message reaches the conclusion…

the original sentence may have gone on vacation! 😂


THE MATHIVATION OF MISCOMMUNICATION

Let's put this into a simple equation:

Meaning = Words × Context × Interpretation

Change the words - 

the meaning may change.

Change the context - 

the meaning may change.

Change the interpretation - 

the entire story may change!

And here is another Mathivation equation:

Misunderstanding = Incomplete Listening × Assumption

The more we assume…

the less we actually listen.


WHY DO WE ADD OUR OWN VERSION?

Because the human brain does not simply record information like a camera.

When information is incomplete or ambiguous, we naturally try to make sense of it using prior knowledge, expectations and context. Research on predictive and top-down processing supports the broader idea that perception and interpretation involve an interaction between incoming information and prior expectations.

There is also a psychological concept called Need for Cognitive Closure - the desire for a clear, definite answer and reduced ambiguity. A strong need for closure can sometimes encourage people to settle on an interpretation quickly rather than remain with uncertainty.

In everyday language:

We don't always like unanswered questions.

So when information is incomplete, the mind may fill the gap.

Sometimes correctly.

Sometimes incorrectly.

And sometimes…

we fill it with such confidence that nobody can convince us otherwise! 😊 

This happens not only in families.

It happens in classrooms.

At workplaces.

Between friends.

In relationships.

On social media.

And especially in conversations where people are already carrying an opinion.

We may not actually be listening to the speaker.

We may be listening to our own expectation of what the speaker is going to say.


A CHILDHOOD MEMORY, A LIFE LESSON

As children, we laugh at these misunderstandings.

As adults, we sometimes create much bigger problems from exactly the same habit.

Someone says:

“We'll see.”

We hear:

“He is angry.”

Someone says:

“I am busy.”

We hear:

“She doesn't care.”

Someone doesn't reply immediately.

We conclude:

“He is avoiding me.”

But perhaps…

we simply don't have the complete context.

Missing Context + Quick Assumption = Wrong Conclusion

And that is where a small misunderstanding can become a big conflict.


THE BETTER EQUATION

Instead of:

Hear → Assume → React

try:

Hear → Pause → Clarify → Understand → Respond

A simple question can sometimes save an entire argument:

“What exactly did you mean?”

That one sentence can be more powerful than ten minutes of explanation.


AND THAT IS THE FUNNY PART…

My father said:

“We'll see at night.”

My uncle heard:

“We'll see him at night.”

My aunt said:

“Baal dho rahi hoon.”

My grandmother reached:

“Moong ki daal dho rahi hai!”

And I discovered, even as a child, that sometimes communication doesn't travel in a straight line.

It takes a detour.

Sometimes through assumptions.

Sometimes through pronunciation.

Sometimes through context.

And sometimes…

straight into a bowl of moong dal! ðŸ˜Š 


A NOTE BEFORE WE LAUGH

These are childhood and university memories shared for their humour and reflection.

The humour is not intended to mock stammering, speech difficulties, accents, dialects, regional languages, or the way any individual or community speaks.

People naturally speak differently because of their region, language, upbringing and communication style.

The real subject of this episode is misinterpretation - what happens when listeners add their own context to someone else's words.

Some dialogues have been reconstructed from memory for storytelling.

Laugh at the misunderstanding - not at the person.


MATHIVATION TAKEAWAYS

  • Hearing is not the same as listening.
  • Words cannot always be understood without context.
  • Prior expectations can influence interpretation.
  • Assumption can silently change meaning.
  • Before reacting, clarify what the other person actually meant.
  • A missing variable can change the entire answer.

And perhaps the most important equation:

Context + Listening + Clarification = Understanding


ONE CURIOUS QUESTION

Have you ever said something completely innocent…

and someone understood something completely different?

Or perhaps you heard something differently because your mind had already created its own context?

Because sometimes…

the biggest communication problem isn't what was said.

It is what we added to it.

And when Baal becomes Daal, Daal becomes Moong, and “We'll see at night” becomes a completely different story…

THIS IS TOO MUCH!


REFERENCES

  • American Psychological Association. APA Dictionary of Psychology — Need for Closure.
  • Kok, P., Mostert, P., & de Lange, F. P. “Prior expectations induce prestimulus sensory templates.” Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 2017.
  • Kok, P., Brouwer, G. J., van Gerven, M. A. J., & de Lange, F. P. “Prior expectations bias sensory representations in visual cortex.” Journal of Neuroscience, 2013.
  • O'Callaghan, C. et al. “Predictions penetrate perception: Converging insights from brain, behaviour and disorder.” Cognitive Neuroscience / PMC, 2017.
Note: The psychological concepts above are used to illuminate the everyday communication examples; they are not intended as a clinical diagnosis of the people in these memories.


Rakesh Kushwaha
Founder, Mathivation Research Lab

A Mathivation Research Lab Initiative

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